Ask these. Stare intensely. Fall in love.
JUST LIKE THAT.
By Catriona Harvey-Jenner
1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want
as a dinner guest?
2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you
are going to say? Why?
4. What would constitute a "perfect" day for you?
5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain
either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life,
which would you want?
7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in
common.
9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised,
what would it be?
11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in
as much detail as possible.
12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or
ability, what would it be?
Part 2
13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself,
your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
14. Is there something that you've dreamed of doing for a long
time? Why haven't you done it?
15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
16. What do you value most in a friendship?
17. What is your most treasured memory?
18. What is your most terrible memory?
19. If you knew that in one year you would die
suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
20. What does friendship mean to you?
21. What roles do love and affection play in your
life?
22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive
characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel
your childhood was happier than most other people's?
24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
Part 3
25. Make three true "we" statements each. For
instance, "We are both in this room feeling ... "
26. Complete this sentence: "I wish I had someone with
whom I could share ... "
27. If you were going to become a close friend with your
partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest
this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you've just met.
29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your
life.
30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By
yourself?
31. Tell your partner something that you like about them
already.
32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to
communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone?
Why haven't you told them yet?
34. Your house, containing everything you own,
catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely
make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you
find most disturbing? Why?
36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner's advice on
how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you
how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
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